Keeping Your Daughter Motivated During Pageant Week

NAM contestant Cortni posing in her interview outfit


I’ve heard many horror stories of moms who criticize and degrade their daughters for “messing up” at their pageants. These are those moms who just get too wound up and deep down, really want their daughter to win. They just don’t know how to best encourage and motivate her. Or, their motives may be in the wrong place to begin with - living vicariously through their daughter's every pageant move. If your daughter “messes up” during pageant weekend, the number one thing to realize is pageant weekend is not the time to wag your finger in her face reminding her of her shortcomings. Here are some other things to keep in mind that will help keep your daughter motivated during pageant week:
1. Don’t expect perfection. Your daughter is not a robot, she’s a human. She’s going to make a mistake from time to time. Instead, expect excellence. When she tries her very best, those efforts should be applauded.
2. Celebrate the little successes. Try your best to find something every day to congratulate your daughter on. For example, if your daughter is naturally shy but she walked over to a new girl and strikes up a conversation, that should be applauded!
Excited contestant, Blayne, won a spirit stick at her pageant
3. Use positive affirmations. Encourage your daughter that she is all-around amazing, that she is beautiful inside and out, that she is strong, and a winner no matter what. Let her know that a crown does not define her, and that you’re already incredibly proud of her.
4. Give her something to look forward to. Plan for a family outing to her favorite restaurant after the finale is over. Keep reminding her of this special occasion designed just for her and it’ll put a smile on her face.
A pageant should not be just about winning the crown because there is so much more to be won-- like confidence, perseverance, new friends, courage, and resilience. Over all, a pageant should be about having fun, and growing. As moms, we should be more encouraging than correcting or criticizing. A daughter’s mind is so impressionable and how we respond in these situations is critical. We should use our pageant journey as a way to bond and build up our daughters, not remind them of their mistakes.

Cortni in one of her winning top model poses
Envision your reign.

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